Look Good, Feel Good
“Clothes Are Made to Fit You”
A friend once told me, “Clothes are made to fit you, not the other way around.”
That simple phrase has followed me through so many seasons of life: wedding planning, pregnancy, postpartum, and now, my ever-changing mid-thirties body. It has become a quiet mantra, a reminder that dressing myself is an act of self-love, not self-correction.
The Arc of a Body
I’ve lived in many different bodies...
In college, I lost 35 pounds for my sport, dropping to a size 4 at 5’10, and ran a mile in under 5 minutes, the fastest on my team. It was a huge accomplishment, built on training two to three times a day and eating with strict consistency. It was the lightest, and fittest I have ever been, yet, even then, I judged my body… not for its power to run fast, lift heavy, or withstand 80 minutes of tackling women 2x my size on the rugby field, but for how it looked compared to the “ideal” I held in my head.
When I graduated, my body shifted again. A size 6. Judged again.
Then came yoga. My body grew strong and graceful in a new way. Judged again.
Pregnancy, postpartum, another pregnancy, another postpartum, and the cycle repeated. Judgment. Self-correction goals. Self-loathing thoughts.
But here I am now, postpartum once more, and for the first time I’m meeting my body with the love it deserves. I’m holding space for the transformation ahead with excitement and grace, not punitive action or restricting diets. This season isn’t about sculpting triceps or chasing abs. It’s about having arms strong enough to lift my babies, and a core resilient enough to carry a car seat on one hip and a toddler on the other.
What I’ve learned through all these cycles is this: you will never look or feel better than you do today. Take the photo. One day, you’ll look back with tenderness at the woman you were. So why not choose to love her now?
Self-Love vs. Self-Correction
For me, the Postpartum journey makes this truth impossible to ignore. Maternity clothes don’t fit. Pre-maternity clothes don’t fit. Your body jiggles in places it never used to. And your priorities have to be healing, feeding your baby, and simply making it through the day.
That’s where clothing becomes powerful in this stage. Choosing pieces that hold your body as it is today is an act of self-love. Forcing yourself into old jeans that cut off your circulation? That’s self-correction.
But here’s the thing: we shouldn’t reserve self-love for postpartum. Every single day is an opportunity to dress our bodies with compassion. Because the clothing industry wasn’t built for people, it was built for profit. Sizing is a template that never fully fits anyone. And you, my dear, are not a template. You are a one-of-one. Your clothes should meet you there.
Feeling Good, Defined
For me, “feeling good” in my clothes comes down to three things:
Comfort in fabric and fit. Clothes shouldn’t be too tight, too loose, too fussy, or too static-y. They should feel just right. In the dressing room, I take note of how an item really lays on my body. If I’m going to tug at a strap, fuss with a fabric that twists and contorts annoyingly, or worry about an exposing slit, it goes back on the rack.
Alignment with identity. Every outfit is a chance to embody who I want to be in the room I’m walking into. Do I want to feel confident and professional? Sexy and intimate? Strong and beautiful? Relaxed and at ease? My priority is dressing in a way that supports that energy is how I show up as my most authentic self, and putting together outfits that meet this version of myself.
Alignment with vision. I shop using my style look book, a curated vision of colors, shapes, and moods that fit my life. I don’t chase labels or sizes; I buy what feels “just right” and invest in tailoring when needed. My husband Ronnie taught me about the tailoring hack, he tailors nearly every pant and shirt he owns, and it shows… his clothes are made to fit him, literally. IMO, tailoring is an underrated secret of great dressers; for a small investment of dollars, you get an outsized return in confidence.
Modeling the Mindset
The words we speak to ourselves about our bodies matter. They shape how we show up in the world and how we respond to others.
If I’m spiraling in self-loathing, even the kindest compliment bounces off me: “Oh thanks, but this dress is annoying.” On the other hand, when I tell myself before leaving the house, “You look damn good and you feel damn good,” a compliment lands fully, and my response is simple: “Thank you. That is so kind to say. I genuinely appreciate it.”
To model this mindset, for myself, my friends, my daughters, this means no body-bashing, not in the mirror to myself, and not out loud in the presence of others. It means prioritizing strength over shrinking. It means choosing outfits that honor the energy I want to bring into the world. Because dressing my body isn’t about fitting into a size, it’s about showing up fully as me.
Look Good, Feel Good
When you choose clothes from self-love, you radiate differently. You smile bigger, sparkle brighter, move with more ease. You become magnetic, not because of the clothes themselves, but because of the energy they unlock.
That’s what look good, feel good really means. And every single one of us deserves that, today, exactly as we are.
My Closet Mantras
How can you bring this advice with you? Environment matters a ton here, so think about these mantras every time you open your closet or head into a dressing room:
When I look good, I feel good.
I am not defined by the sizing of a for-profit company’s best interests.
Clothes are made to fit me. I was not made to fit these clothes.
I will not self-correct for an industry that wasn’t built for me.
One day I’ll look back at this body with love, so I’m going to love her today.
Clothing is never just clothing. It’s how we tell our bodies, I love you exactly as you are. And you are worthy of love, as you are, today, unaltered.
🥗 Recipe for Success: Dressing with Self-Love
What you’ll need: your body, exactly as it is today, clothes that feel just right, a dash of self-love.
How to make
Dress for how you want to feel, not a size.
Forget the tag, choose what fits you.
Sprinkle in affirmations, to taste.
How to enjoy: Step out in your outfit feeling radiant and magnetic. Let your clothes remind you: I was not made to fit them, they were made to fit me. Emphatically enjoy compliments, and respond with genuine thanks. You look great, Sweetie :)
